In the last few months of each year, I take time to seek God about where we’ve been and where we are going in the year to come. I do this for myself, my family, my church, and the body of Christ as a whole. I’m not claiming to be a prophet or that God sends me a yearly progress report with set goals for the new year! I simply take an honest look at where I am and how I got there—both good and bad! If I have achieved something that I’ve really been working on, I want to say I get a gold star and that’s it. But, nope, I have to keep moving and progressing. What and how I got to point A may not be the roadmap that will get me to point B or even maintain where I am. If you’re going on a trip, who wants to stay at the airport? You’ve arrived at your destination but that’s not where you stay—you’re ready to explore the area and see what it’s about and all it has to offer. For example, maybe you had a goal to get up an hour early to do Bible reading. What a great discipline! Now, maybe God says, “Now that I have you up at this hour and you are disciplined in your Bible reading, I want you to spend time with me for that hour in prayer and communion. I want to be with you. You can do your Bible reading at night but uninterrupted like before.”

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However you see it, the holiday season either creeps or crash lands upon us. And so it begins ... as many begin planning dinner a sad tradition ensues along with the arguments that come with it. The dreaded conversation has to be had. You know the one: where are we having dinner this year, who is coming, who is not, who is fighting, who is not speaking, whose turn is it, can we do both sets of grandparents in one day, it’s my parents’ turn out-of-town, no it’s my parents’ turn to come here, how can we avoid making anybody angry, are we leaving anybody out, what about all the little kids, who is bringing what, who is on a diet, who is gluten-free, sugar-free, or flavor free, who does organic only, who is allergic to pumpkin, turkey, ham, or sweet potatoes, who has gone vegan this year? What? There’s a difference in vegan and vegetarian? Who do we please or offend? Bah Humbug already? Sorry folks, we’re just getting started; we aren’t past Thanksgiving yet or even half of the Hallmark Christmas movies!

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Many years ago, my husband preached a sermon and one quote emerged that distinctly characterized his ministry. He declared, “It’s time we return to the discarded values of the past.” He continued to emphasize the way our society had declined in morality and standards of excellence, honor and integrity. Once political correctness and liberal ideology invaded our culture, the foundational values we were taught as children were either rare or non-existent. His was one voice that felt compelled to shine a light in a dark place. I remember purchasing a book for him by Judge Robert Bork (former Supreme Court nominee) which I believe accurately summed up the country’s condition, “Slouching Towards Gomorrah-Modern Liberalism and American Decline.”

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When I saw this photo and the heartfelt words beneath it, I had to share it. It blessed me in so many ways and not just because my daughter is in it! However, her words are my hope for all of us who serve together and for every person regardless of our many differences, skill sets, backgrounds, degrees, titles, giftings and personalities. We should be celebrated and celebrate one another. People in your life should be your greatest cheerleaders no matter if you scored the touchdown or sat the bench. You still practiced, tried, showed up and put on the uniform to be a part of something. I love this line in a song saying, “I’m the greatest fan of your life.” I’ve used that quite often because it’s true. What an honor it is to be on the sidelines while someone else gets the win, an answered prayer, a good report, an unexpected blessing or a divine miracle! How can we not cheer or celebrate? It doesn’t need to be a spectacular event. Someone deserves to be appreciated just for being a good worker, a good listener or a good friend. All too often, we celebrate achievements rather than people. You don’t need to win a Nobel Prize to be great. We need to applaud the effort more and not just the outcome.

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After so much of that, I became resentful and angry at others but mostly myself. Why did pleasing people matter so much? Why did approval of others matter and why did I never upset the apple cart when I had every right to? I kept shrinking away while creating this supermom and killing myself to do so. I wanted my husband and kids to think I was amazing, and even though I enjoyed all of my endeavors, my digging uncovered what it cost later in life and more importantly, who and what I lost.

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